Wednesday, October 8, 2014


i am a loner
being sad because of love
shedding tears because of love

Friday, September 26, 2014

...i'm not your superwoman
i'm not the kind of girl that you can let down
and think that everything's okay
boy, i am only human
this girl needs more than occasional hugs
as a token of love from you to me.
..look into the corners of your mind
i'll always be there for you through good and bad times
but i can't be the superwoman that you want me to be
i'll give my love,oh, lasting love if you'll return love to me..

my feelings have been stomped on countless of times.  maybe i am exaggerating or even being a drama queen but it is exactly how i feel. one minute i am laughing my head off, the next minute it feels like someone is ripping out my heart. (told you - drama queen). shall i throw in the towel, call it quits, yadiya yadiya yadiya. things that go through my mind every single day, things that i have to decide on and deal with are driving me insane. 

we have the authority to decide, if the foundation is strong, then everything will turn out as how it should, so i was told. i am trying my very best to lay the foundation, trying to make it strong and it is freaking difficult.  

you can see my tears but you can never feel my pain inside.

i am no Superwoman.

Thursday, May 15, 2014

long overdue Perhentian trip for the kids.
not for mama though. mama no friends with sea and air.
the kids enjoyed snorkeling and mama enjoyed her 'me' time doing nothing.
no cute men in sight to cuci mata..bummer!
till the next trip that involves no sea & air :D

Thursday, March 13, 2014

only with my heart, i will want you
only with my heart, i will kiss you
do not be sorry, this is just life
whether you love me or feel sorry
i feel the same way.

Tuesday, February 25, 2014

it was a sad morning.
and it is still sad in the afternoon.
will the sadness ever go away..... today?
some people are meant to be who they are suppose to be
and some are not.
well, i guess i am the latter.
is being the youngest mean that i want everything to go my way
by hook or by crook
do i put on a tantrum at this old age when things do not go
the way i planned and hoped?
i am just plain tired and sad.

Monday, February 17, 2014


i know you are somewhere out there
somewhere far away.
melayan lagu sedey di pejabat, just because i can. malas nak melayan drama orang tua yang terasa diri masih muda, just because i can (me is an exceptional). updating my blog during office hours, just because i can. thinking about you who is unavailable to me, just because i can't think of anyone else.

Friday, February 7, 2014

Ted Mosby's speech on LOVE..

LOVE means caring about someone beyond all rationality and wanting them to have everything they want, no matter how much it destroys you. it is LOVE. and when you LOVE someone, you do not stop, ever! even when people roll their eyes or call you crazy, even then, especially then.
you do not give up because if you could give up, if you could take the whole world's advice and move on and find someone else, that would not be LOVE. that would be some other disposable thing that is not worth fighting for.
that is not what this is.