Friday, December 14, 2012

whenever i look at this picture, i'd do the same.

Thursday, December 13, 2012

he is going all around Indonesia performing with the not-so-new group NOAH. reading their updates via twitter and FB is driving me nuts. wonder when will Malaysia be on their list.

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Monday, October 15, 2012

buying a house is a big decision. location, price, nearby facilities yadiya yadiya yadiya. am in the midst of buying a house, yes at this age.
been going through advert by advert each and every working day. dah naik pening. found a place that would not burn a hole in the pocket by end of the month, enough rooms for everybody, location wise - far from the current place but nearer to the workplace. a nearby house in a familiar surrounding with all the necessary facilities, less space and costs a bomb. 
making this decision is scary. moving to somewhere affordable means i will be far away from people and places that are familiar to me, scary. what if i have a panic attack in the middle of the night? what if i hear noises in the house and am too afraid to check it out. what if, what if, what if...
a nearby place gives a sense of security - knowing that i can call out to someone that i know just in case anything should happen in the middle of the night.
maka....saya membuat keputusan untuk mencari jodoh. bila dah ada partner, doesn't matter where i stay kan? :D

Thursday, October 11, 2012

.....our wounds remind us of where we have been and what we have overcome. even remind us what to avoid in the future..but sometimes it doesn't work that way. sometimes we have to learn over again.

Friday, October 5, 2012

am happy and sad at the same time.
happy that we are having normal conversations like we used to.
and happy to know that i do cross your mind, occasionally.
sad to know that you were confused about the dreams that you had.
and am sad too about that feeling of yours.
when i said my goodbye just now, it felt like that was my last goodbye.
just so you know, the haunted house has a special place in my heart.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

was bored in the office...
dok scroll pictures..
couldn't find a picture of me that i like (what's new)
wanted to post up a pic of Ariel and me - side by side..
alas..someone beat me to it.. :)
btw, both of them have lovely smiles.


Saturday, August 25, 2012


do i like you or do i love you? love? Wikipedia explains love as

......... a variety of different feelings, states, and attitudes, ranging from pleasure ("I loved that meal") to interpersonal attraction ("I love my partner"). "Love" may refer specifically to the passionate desire and intimacy of romantic love, to the sexual love of eros, to the emotional closeness of familiallove, to the platonic love that defines friendship,[4] or to the profound oneness or devotion of religious love[5], or to a concept of love that encompasses all of those feelings. This diversity of uses and meanings, combined with the complexity of the feelings involved, makes love unusually difficult to consistently define, compared to other emotional states.

hmm...i think i like you.


Monday, May 28, 2012

had i not grieved enough for the past 7 years? had i not shed more tears than the pacific ocean & hindi ocean put together? went through an episode last night. an i-miss-you-like-crazy-felt-like-i-could-die kind of episode. 
miss his silly jokes, his smile, his laughter.
miss our fights..big and small.
miss everything about him.
al-Fatihah.


Friday, May 18, 2012

the anxiety, fear, uncertainty, anger...
all jumbled up into one giant ball that is taking control over my mind and body.
people say i need to do A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K..................................


Monday, March 26, 2012

lama jugak dah tak menulis di sini. buntu untuk menulis. episod suka, sedih, sakit hati, memendam perasaan dan semua yang sewaktu dengannya cuba untuk diluah tapi dek kerana tahap kemalasan yang melampau untuk berfikir, menyusun ayat dan mengetuk papan kekunci menyebabkan semuanya dipendam. pendam sehari dua ok lagi, bila melebihi expiry date...jiwa jadi kacau, habis semua di sekeliling nak dimarah. tagline "emotionally challenged" memang sangat sesuai dengan wan amal hayati. hahahaha.
rata-rata anak-anak sedara semuanya dah besar panjang. habis exam, sambung belajar, bekerja, bertunang, bernikah...semuanya mengingatkan lagi betapa maksu depa nie dah tua. lagi-lagi bila tengok cucu 2 orang. haish! bercucu dah wahwo nie tapi perangai masih tak berubah....hehehe.
tengok orang lain happy, hati pun ikut teruja tapi......

Wednesday, March 21, 2012