Saturday, January 31, 2009

hari nie genap 4 tahun. sekejap je masa berlalu. i have a friend yang tiap-tiap tahun akan message me on this date juz to say "alfatihah buat arwah". the same person whom i hurt a few months back. i was juz saying to her macam mana at times i feel sad for being left alone n that i've been with him since like forever. it's like part of my life yang i dah belajar terima is gone and i tak tau nak buat apa seterusnya. and kadang-kadang i'm happy pasal i don't need to fight with him or risau about getting hurt by him - macam lift off some burdens off my shoulders. i am like a nutcase. i still miss him a lot and i think it's holding me back. or maybe the fact that i'm still living in his neighbourhood - is holding me back. amal, can u actually afford to move elsewhere at the moment? hmm, tak mampu atau takut? yadiya! yadiya!

Friday, January 30, 2009

got in touched with an old friend back from ITM. i called him Hitam Manis because he's a bit on the dark side and when he smiled, it was the sweetest smile. everytime nampak dia kat kampus, i would always sing lagu R.Azmi - Hitam Manis. it was fun hanging out with him. he laughed a lot and cakap pun ala-ala kelibut gitu. there were flirting but nothing serious. it's nice to have some sweet memories dengan orang yang tak sama course, kan? anyway, lost contact lepas grad. arwah tak suka me having contacts with old male friends. so i guess, when i hooked up with him, i lost all my male friends...kind of sad gaklah. kawan kan, apa salahnye.
biler berhubung balik dengan kawan-kawan lama, terimbas balik kenangan lampau. i had plans and stuff to do. after graduation, nak further study and pelan-pelan kayuh to build a life and career. then pi carik balik the nice guy who i idiotly dumped and try to make up for all the years that i left him. kalau ada rezeki and ada jodoh, we'd hooked up. kalau tak, we'd remain as friends - ala2 cite dalam novel gitu. but He had other plans for me and so i belajar untuk terima kehidupan baru - not an easy task i must say.


Thursday, January 29, 2009

emo lah u nie. nah! layan lagu nie.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

I have so much anger in me today. i don’t really know what’s the cause but every single thing just gets on my nerves. soo mad, angry and sad at the same time. feel bad for the kids for having me as their mom@mak tiri. kids are kids rite? they are naughty and adorable at the same time. i love them so much that at times i think i’m over protective of them. with so many perverts and sickos around, who wouldn’t, rite? anyway, enough said. spent the long CNY break at Cherating with the Wans. we had so much fun (well, i did). missed Kak and family though. Syu had an emergency operation on Friday. oh well, some things were not meant to be kan? kita merancang Allah yang menentukan, kan? masa kat sana, this topic came up. rupa-rupanya we, the Wans, adalah orang bandar yang terlupa asal usul diri just because we communicate more in English, we listen to English songs and bla, bla, bla...kira macam westernized lah nie. hmm, naper nak pertikaikan the way we lead our lives? we cannot help it, it was the way we were brought up. just because we lead our lives lain sikit dari orang lain, tak bermakna kami lupa diri. me and Syu sometimes communicate dalam bahasa Melayu yang tersusun, kan Syu? kalau mereka yang berkenaan dengar the Wans berkaraoke kat Cherating mesti depa nangis. hahaha!!! menyanyikan lagu-lagu bahasa Inggeris dari era 70an dan 80an, that was what we did. (my sisters and BIL rocked the house!!!) just for the record, saya menonton cerita tempatan baik di TV mahupun di panggung wayang, membeli VCD/DVD original karya tempatan, mendengar juga musik tempatan (walaupun tak 100%), membeli CDs original anak seni tempatan dan membaca novel-novel tulisan anak Melayu. so don’t go calling people lupa diri kalau tak tahu apa-apa. letihlah depa nie kan. macam Put3 dalam Gol dan Gincu yang berbaju kurung, berbahasa Melayu sepenuhnya, attend teater Melayu and bacaan puisi just to fit in and please Reza...hahaha.


we arrived late but that didn't stop the kids from playing

the kids woke up as early as 6.30 am to play..

makcik-makcik pun nak join jugak the fun, we definitely woke up everybody on the beach

takde istilah air sejuk untuk bebudak nie






part of sesi karaoke yang menggegarkan Cherating

Cherating's Next Top Model wannabe. we were actually checking out surfers (not as potrayed in the movies, boring!!)

kak mah had fun playing the kite..hmm..


Monday, January 19, 2009

hari nie menerima perkabaran salah seorang dari kawan rapat arwah dari zaman sekolah meninggal dunia, meninggalkan seorang balu dan tiga orang anak-anak yang masih kecil. sempat singgah untuk menziarah tapi tidak berkesempatan untuk berjumpa dengan Farah. secara kebetulan arwah dan rakannya meninggalkan kami di dalam bulan yang sama. moga roh WS dicucuri rahmat dan ditempatkan di kalangan mereka yang beriman. Al-Fatihah.